Scoring a half century

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We landed in our fifties almost quietly. We landed there when we realised that the prospect of death is real and cannot be escaped, and that time is precious and too short to fiddle with any longer. The consistent decline of mental and physical agility, along with the decay of the body, became a constant reminder of our “existential threat”. We began to see that the quality of our life was increasingly determined by “pills” and “bills”.

We arrived at the place and realised that aloneness was strength and solitude was joyful. We learned that loneliness is not the result of lack of company but the result of bad company, and that the feeling of “mental security” evoked by a crowd cannot outweigh the dreadful feeling of “mental isolation” evoked by being surrounded by certain people.

We became aware that less was more and started decluttering all the nooks and corners of our existence that could downsize our life. We came to know that simplicity has a competitive advantage.

The elimination of unworthy things results not only in savings in TCS (time, cost, space) but also in freeing our effort and focus for something more meaningful. We landed in this age zone where we felt no longer excited by the appearance of packaging and, rather, felt more enthused to know about the content lying behind. We learned that glitz and glitter, though tempting, are a part, not the whole, and that the lesser cannot ensure the beauty and quality of the greater. We grew up to realise that we altered not only our perspective but also our preference for shades of colours. We no longer chased the favourite hues or shades of our past. Instead of conforming to the stale past, we started challenging it. With locks of hair greying, we wanted to experiment with any shade and hue our fresh mind wanted to dance with.

We reached the point where we stopped reacting or retaliating to insults, criticisms, or rejection and began to heal the injury silently inside. We understood that insult and abuse are mere subjective opinions and that rejection is the redirection of resources to a better venture. We also grew up emotionally and spiritually at the same time to earn wisdom, peace, and fulfilment. We discovered that while the healing process of hurt was active in silence, so was a state of awareness quietly driving us to enquire into the reality of our inward state. We became aware of our own feelings, emotions, impulses, and tendencies, and the psychology of their dominance within.

We realised, through introspection and self-reflection, that we were flawed and fragmented and filled with fear, expectation, and hope, which often carried the seeds of sorrows and suffering. Having realised that ignorance was not bliss, we began exploring to learn how to unburden ourselves from suffering.

We slowly transformed ourselves into “change agents” to overhaul our current state and break free from the old past. Yes, we were still growing up, silently and gently. And the journey of learning has not ended.

anuraggohainassam@gmail.com